Life Lessons (And What I'm Thankful For)

Everybody seems to have those lessons in life where at the time, you maybe don't appreciate them or are thankful for them, but as time passes and people leave your life, you truly do appreciate them.  Maybe you had some early in life, late in life, or are going through some now...we all have them at some point.  Mine have actually come in the last year, and I can truly say now that I appreciate them, and am thankful for them.  What's making me appreciate them even more now, as I write this, is just reflecting how thankful I am that I was able to get through them with the help of one of my favorite managers, who actually left the place I work.  He took time to get to know me, was able (and willing) to talk with me whenever something was wrong, really stepped up to the plate and pulled me aside when something needed to be addressed or could tell something was wrong, and truly had my back. 

With his help over the last year (and several others I know), I have been able to learn a lot about what I can and can't do, what I need to work on, and how to take a step back from things among others.  There are a lot of little, and some big ones, that I've learned since I transferred to the store I'm currently at, and some of them are:

• Learning to take a step back and reflect on how things affect me personally (or why I do certain things), or how what I do can affect how others see me or might view me.  For example, I've always been a control freak, always wanting to control situations or make sure things go my way.  It wasn't until early to mid-February when my manager pulled me aside and said some co-workers said I was bossy, along with starting an online bible study, that I realized that I really do need to work on the whole control issue.  Another example is just somebody telling me read a certain book, or just asking me the question "why?" when I am in a certain mood or do certain things because if I can look inside and realize what I'm doing is not always a good thing, I can start to work on them and address issues.
• I can't always work long days and be a workaholic because at some point, it's going to catch up to me and I'm going to have issues (although it's gotten somewhat better, I still deal with wanting/needing to work a lot of hours because I need the money).  I can't always be on the go all the time either with a whole bunch of things going on.  There comes a point that eventually I will break down because I'm trying to do too much and at some point, I will have to start weeding things out of my life that I don't necessarily want to (I've always had this issue, even in college when I tried to take classes, have a job, do sports band, AND do the campus radio and TV stations...I had to cut things out that I liked doing).  It comes down to time management with this one.
• Playing off the previous point, I have learned that there are times where I need to say enough is enough and start having, or putting, limits on what I can and can't do, or what I will or will not deal with (whether it's saying that I can't stay late at work, telling people not to act in a certain way or say certain things because I won't deal with it, etc)
• I have learned that it is okay to have certain people to talk to about things, and considering that I don't trust a lot of people in telling them what's going on, this is HUGE for me.  People do get that each of us have issues, and with that one certain manager, I was able to talk to him and let him know what was going on, ask him about how to work on certain things, and just be comfortable in talking to him.  But with him being gone now, I have realized that I do need to stand on my own two feet, try to put into practice what I've learned, find my own ways to figure things out, and if I need to talk to someone, I don't need to be afraid to do so because there are enough people around me who do care.
• I also know that people around me at church and work really do care and are genuinely supportive of me.  As another manager (team lead) told me today when I stopped in at work, "you're in good hands" (or something very similar).  It's amazing to me how people are willing to say that they are there for me if I ever need it.  I guess I've always known it deep down, but maybe I've just been too stubborn or didn't think twice about before until recently.

It's been a tough year with trying to deal with a lot of personal and work issues, but I know that I'm stronger because of it, and because of all the lessons I have learned along the way.  With the one manager who's always had my back being gone, I can look back at this last year and can truly thank God for giving me the opportunity to be a better person (I hope) for it and truly cherish what I've learned.  It's a never ending struggle for me to continue to work on these life lessons that I've been dealing with, but I'm grateful for them regardless.  I know I wouldn't have gotten through the last year without that one manager having my back, taking me under his wing, but I can see now that each step of the way was quite a blessing and I think it was God's way of providing me what I needed to get through each and every step, whether I knew it or not.  I am truly thankful for everything that has happened, and I am very glad that I was able to make some changes in my life to make these things happen...I don't think I would've learned them any other way if I hadn't transferred stores or my favorite manager willing to do what he did over the year.  I'm so glad to be surrounded by so many great people, and I am grateful for each and every one of them.